Opening of Clyde State School
By “Critic”

Sing a song of sixpence,
A banquet in a church;
Some got invitations,
Some left in the lurch.

When the church was opened,
The funny folks flocked in
To hear the funny speeches,
And to see the feast begin.

The King of Clyde stood up to speak;             (C. Croskell, Chairman of School Committee)
He really did his best.
He spoke just half-a-dozen words,
And then he lost the rest.

We don’t know where they went to,
But we know they “done a get”;
Perhaps they fell into the bag
That held the serviette.

Mary had a little bag,                                                (Mary Ann Stewart)
She took it to the banquet
And stuffed it full of serviettes,
And said the Lord be thanked.

Charlie over the water,                                             (Charlie Picken, local farmer)
You’re in the picture too,
Pickin’ things off the table –
A thing you should not do.

A man, well Kent, to the banquet went,              (J.R. Kent, Secretary of School Committee)
He sat at the end of the table;
He had no bag to fill with swag,
So he ate all he was able.

Hi, diddle diddle, here is a riddle,
The end of the tale is stuck to the middle;
Though I’m not quite sure that my name
‘aint McGuiness,                                                                 (McGuiness, the local blacksmith)
I know quite well that the end is the Finnis.

A feast of turkey, ham and tongue,
To feed the old but not the young,
The committee felt satisfied, perhaps,
The school kids – they came for scraps.

From South Bourke & Mornington Journal - 4th July 1918